What I'm Made Of

This past month has truly been the most difficult I think I've been thru so far in my life.  I've realized I've lived a sheltered life.  Always being protected, loved, guided.  Now I'm out here in this world on my own, and I've gotten heart break, conned, and hated on.  What a month? lol  I'm trying not to focus on these negatives, so I laugh at myself cuz that's the only thing I can do.  But you know what's funny, thru all these things that have gotten me down, cried, on my way to becoming cynical about the world and people, I know I'm a good person and I don't want to stay down, cry, or be cynical about anything.  I want to live with integrity, honesty, and full of light that when I smile it isn't fake or tainted.  And I can still say no matter what, I'm still smiling,,,and I mean it too.  You should see me. lol It's soo easy to be mad, upset, ask why me?,,,but I'm kinda blessed to get these lessons of being more aware of my surroundings, let people earn my trust, don't just divulge everything to everyone, keep the tru people in my life close, and hold myself even closer.  I can only fully know what I'm thinking, feeling, my intentions in this world.  Karma is a kicker.